Would You Marry a What Girl?

There is a video recently released on YouTube, filmed in India, where a female reporter takes to the city streets armed with a microphone and video camera, asking the general public the following question.

“Would You Marry a Raped Girl?”

I came across this via an article on my Facebook newsfeed, and stared at the post for a while before I clicked on it. I found I wasn’t interested in the responses, but the question itself was holding my attention.

Would You Marry a Raped Girl?

I did not know that was even a thing. It immediately reminded me of many girls in our region, who having reached “marriageable age” found much to their embarrassment that they were being overlooked due to their ‘darker’ skin colouring, or because they were overweight.

“Would You Marry a Dark Skinned Girl?”

“Would You Marry a Fat Girl?”

Living in South (East) Asia I know this to be a fact. Men are believed to not want to marry a poor girl, a not so pretty girl, a not highly educated girl and so on. Matrimonial websites are overflowing with ads proclaiming young girls with fair skin, slender builds, good breeding, purity, high academic qualifications etc. Now it looks like those ads might begin to include “Not Raped” or “Raped,” depending.

We all know these ads, these labels, these “traditional ways” are upheld mainly by the female population in our lands. They are the ones who require them, enforce them, insist on them. Why else would the “tea trolley” gathering during marriage proposals be such a major event if not for the purpose of “viewing and observing” a girl?

“Son, would you marry this tea server?”

The second thing the video reminded me of were the hit television shows “Who Wants to Marry a *insert appropriate label*?” – I wondered if India’s penchant for manufacturing excessively sponsored TV game shows out of such ideas would take root with this one as well, and that heaven forbid Pakistan should follow suit.

“Who Wants to Marry The Raped Girl?” sounds about right for a title doesn’t it? Which semi-retired matronly actress would be picked to host the show?

As you can probably tell, I am disgusted. I am also beyond feeling shocked or saddened by the spectacle being made out of rape survivors in such a despicable manner. This is not about whether the answer to this question should be “Yes,” “No” or “Maybe” – This is a question that should not be asked in the first place, because it disrespects all women.

I wonder if the reporter considers her interview show a “feminist move.” It certainly reeks of that. I feel it is easy to believe you’re a feminist because you have education to your name, a job, and the all important “financial independence” which seems to have become the battle cry of many women in South East Asia these days. Sadly, the belief is that earning these tags which break the age-old and more traditional molds is to many enough to think of themselves as feminists.

It is not.

Did the reporter with all her “taking to the streets independence” pause long enough to think she could very well become a victim of rape herself? No she did not. How many young girls are being gang-raped on the streets these days? (and not just in India by the way) Did it occur to her that she might have asked one or more rapists that question during her show?

Also, and most importantly, would she even consider asking a question like that if she was ever (heaven forbid) in the shoes of a rape survivor? I’m guessing no. So, what makes her believe she is different and above them? What gives her the right to tag yet another label on women and expect them to just bear it? How is this progressive, or feminist, or right in any damned way?

It is not feminist to do that, it is not morally correct to do that either. Because it shows blatant disregard for the survivors of a terrible and brutal crime, which incidentally is still not really considered a crime in our part of the world. There are barely any laws for it, and we all know that. And, if people believe that going into public and asking questions such as this one is raising some kind of awareness, or being progressive in some way, then they are fucking idiots.

What I saw this woman do was this.

She took every woman who has been raped by men, and paraded them publicly before men, and asked those same men if they would accept these survivors as their wives.

That is the depth of ignorance, classlessness, and anti-feminism in this reporter and everyone who supports her cause by actually dignifying her question with an answer.

In one over-eager-to-prove-something move they gave control over womens bodies, minds and emotions right back to men. It reminded me of all those Star Plus shows where the new daughter-in-law is accused of some moral crime, and the whole family stands silent watching her getting lamblasted till the male hero steps in and says he accepts her. The audience of course breaks into cheers and sighs over his manly acceptance of her, and like dumb fuck sheep his family nod their approval of his wiser sense. There might be a couple of people who wonder why the heroine was questioned in the first place, but who wants to hear them, right? If they mention it, there might be a rally to have their question erased for all eternity.

Why are so many women in our region still doing this kind of shit to other women, then turning right around and blabbering about how fucking progressive they are?   What is this mindless fascination with showing themselves as “liberal” on the outside while actually just being too chicken shit to actually progress where it matters? Where is the goddamned “stance” they keep claiming they’re taking in this world?

I am not interested in whether men should or should not “accept” women who are rape survivors, whether they will marry them or not, date them or not, consider them “damaged” or not. I do not want to pound on men and say “Oh you MUST” or “Wow you’re so NICE to accept her as your wife. Kudos.”

What I am interested in is not seeing yet another fucking category for women to be slotted into as if we are pieces of meat in a butcher’s shop, and I certainly don’t want to see it being done by women.

I have lost almost all patience with the women in our region who do this, and let’s not kid ourselves, a majority do it. Every wedding, every social event, every online platform… They are everywhere and in large numbers, and no they are not just “of the uneducated classses.”

Let’s call a spade a spade, shall we?

The female reporter in this video is not uneducated, neither are the women supporting her cause believing they’re doing a good deed towards “those poor raped girls” while brandishing their own freedom, social status, their academic certification, their power jobs, their ‘choice’ to be homemakers, their gleeful turn downs of a couple of arranged marriage proposals, all of which most likely makes them feel they’re badass feminists.

They are not either feminist or badass if this is the shit they’re pulling.

Feminism is a process, and it would serve us well to learn more about it before jumping on some imaginary cliquey bandwagon because it’s the cool thing to do. These women are coming across as ignorant asses and they’re too full of themselves to notice. As a woman, I am embarrassed for them.

Feminism needs to be understood before we shout about it from the rafters. We need to read more about the women of past who struggled, pushed and fought so we can enjoy what we do today. The opportunity to get an education, to work, to vote, to make our own choices, and to keep progressing towards equality in a world where it’s difficult to be that. We do not need to make it worse for ourselves.

Respect for all women. It is the very foundation of the feminist movement, not some game show where women have to conquer a series of set tasks and come out victorious with gift hamper prizes from L’Oreal at the end. Neither is it about hating on men, or setting out to prove we’re better than they are.

The goal is equality, and not just being “equal to men,” it is also about being equal among ourselves as a gender.

~*~

P.S. I did not post the link to the video, because I don’t want to link back from this blog. If you want to view it, try Google search.

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26 Replies to “Would You Marry a What Girl?”

  1. Anne, You have written here in a much deeper and stronger sense about what I felt when I saw the article. I too saw this video link in FB but didnt feel like checking it out because the title left a bitter taste in my mouth and I definitely didnt had the tolerance or patience to go through it and feel more disgust than I already felt when I saw it..right now I cant exactly put my thoughts into words. But want to tell you that your post reignited the anger I felt towards the insensitiveness with which this video was posted

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Very straight and very hard hitting…very YOU !! and i want to bow to you ,u to take bow…..for showing a mirror. Yes,sadly we r hypocrites, sympathizing with the victim, while at the same time being happy/relieved inside that this did not happen to us. and with the reporting of rape cases in media on rise, all this is very cool,chic even.
    THANKS!

    Like

  3. Thank you Anne. I haven’t yet seen this video, but I will. It brings to mind a very common fallout of rape in India, where the rapist agrees to marry his victim and all is “well” in her world. I have never been able to understand the logic of court decisions where the judge has asked the perpetrator whether he is willing to make amends by making the survivor his wife and then let the guy off. Seriously? That makes rape alright?

    And now we have reporters asking men if they’d be magnanimous enough to marry this “poor unfortunate RAPED girl”. What utter crap is this?!

    You talk about feminism and how women believe our educational qualifications, our freedom to move about with or without the opposite sex, dress, drink, smoke, speak our minds makes us feminists. I agree. It does NOT. At the same time, letting a man pay for a meal, hold the door open for us, allow us to enter a room before he does, or perform any of the small so-called “gentlemanly” courtesies does not, in my book, demean women or make us any less “feminist”. Feminism to me is more about respect for women and among women. Sometimes I feel we bring ourselves down with no help from the opposite gender, just as the reporter appears to be doing.
    (Yet I wonder whether I should give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe this is not her idea? Maybe this is the brainchild of some male (or worse, female) executive on the channel who believes this would make for good viewership since this is such a “happening” issue? And she’s only doing her job? Sometimes, I wonder whether there is room for argument on such asinine assignments)

    Liked by 3 people

    1. A, my friend, you raise a good point in it possibly being a job assignment, however I do feel the need to question the women who take part in such spectacles (case in point the model who did the “rape” ads) because more and more in this day and age excuses such as “it’s my job” don’t exactly cut it for me. Not if on the other hand there is absolute insistence that there are women and they only “roar” – know what I mean?

      Like I said, I am losing patience with this lot who in my opinion screech about stuff that’s needless, and take no stance where it matters. The refusal to begin making changes within THEMSELVES is what is most frustrating and brings about such backward progression.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Anne, we can to and fro about the “it’s my job” question. But what you say is absolutely true about women agreeing to be a part of so-called “awareness” campaigns like that awful, downright insensitive ‘rape’ ad. And the creator has the gall to be proud that his work has created such controversy. A-hole!

        Change will have to come from within to make a difference but that will take a long time. Yet, I am hopeful that some day that WILL happen when I read and hear what our young friends on this blog say and how they react. They are still in a minority, I agree, but they are still a heck of a lot more than there were when I was a teenager.
        Call me overly optimistic, but I still say there is hope that thinking will change. Even if there are 2 progressive moves for every 10 regressive steps I believe it is still a move in the right direction.

        Like

  4. Hi …. Reading into the first few paragraphs i did nt know if one shld feel sad or disgusted with all if ths …. I dont know how many of ur readers r based n india n did thy read todays article n the newspaper wr a photographer has done a photo shoot with the nirbhaya rape case as the bak drop …. Its showing a woman being molested by 3 men n a bus … Mind u its a photo shoot …. Totally disgusting …. Clarification given by the photographr is tht he is trying to show what women n delhi go thru …. Its sooo sad …..
    Comung bak to ur article i totally agree with u on ur point tht we need to be equal amngst us first rather than be equal to men … I think v r way above thm ….
    Wanna write some more abt mind sets which hav such a false prenotion abt pretty n beautiful but tht n the next post ….
    Write now hubby home n its dinner tym
    Late n the night wanna share some views abt who exactly is pretty
    Thr is sooo much goin on in my mind write now … Just hope im able to pen it all down
    Biiii

    Like

  5. This is just sick man and to actually hear a woman asking such a question to the survivors of a brutal act is just not right. I haven’t seen the video and I don’t want to as it doesn’t feel right to me. But am am glad you shared ur thoughts on this Anne.

    Like

  6. I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will.” – Emily Bronte might have written these lines when she, like all of us ,felt the chains ensnaring the will of a woman and her identity.

    Sometimes I feel being a woman sounds more like an occupation .It’s like to be allowed as female we need to have an appropriate moral code, dressing sense, should be obedient to the other gender . If we tick all the boxes then only I am acknowledged as a female.

    Unfortunately Rape has become another box in this report card of our existence.

    Rape is the resultant of gender discrimination. It should be shameful and humiliating for the men folk as this is the true blot on their manhood .It is the most despicable , degrading way a person can violate another , among the most terrible things that can happen to a human, death included , the worse is Rape.

    The way the issue is treated makes me feel as if we are numb to it. By labeling the rape victims and marking them out in the society aren’t we segregating them and humiliating their dignity again. What was the purpose of this video- was it to show how rape victims are viewed, or was it to earn accolades for some “real men” because they agreed to be benevolent and marry the victims. Why should the “real man” feel a sense of pride by marrying a rape victim, shouldn’t he be filled with shame instead that his gender is capable enough to do the most heinous crime ever possible. Why should it be a “big deal”. What are we expecting from the victim here, should she be thankful that people are willing to marry her inspite of an unwanted tag. Does this mean , that in case of some quarrel , the guy would throw her being rape victim on her face and quote his noble act to establish supremacy. Why are we celebrating this “noble act”? is this also not adding to rape culture.

    A guy can have sex zillion times (provided he wore protection) but a girl if unfortunately goes through this traumatic experience , she is branded as either a special case or “impure. Why marrying her should ever be a big deal? or be looked through special lenses. What are we expecting the girl to see in this noble man’s eyes- sympathy , or are we to tell her that someone was generous enough to pick her because of another label, albeit that of Rape.

    it;s like Violators(abuser and society) continuously deny living with the truth of their crime, while the survivors cannot live without it. They are hounded by the ramification of this crime all the time.

    The video intentionally or unintentionally brings the focus back on women. When the awareness should be in spreading that it is never her fault, nor the alcohol , definitely not her short dress.

    If the aim was to award or show the changing society and more acceptance of rape survivors. I think the arrow missed the mark, it is not about accepting the rape survivors. They don’t need acceptance, it is as much as their world, their freedom as for others. It should have been about men and why they feel the need to leer, molest, rape or eve tease . It should be about society and its slut-shame culture.

    As for the fellow members of my gender who prefer to poke their noses under the scent of feminism , they are just wrapping us in another layer of gender discrimination – the one which is between my own gender. How does a rape survivor differ from me or the reporter in this video. Fair-dark, tall-short, fat-slim. Is it because we still seek the approval of men that we need to feel better about ourselves and thus put the fellow females by marking them in different categories. It seems we are fighting a race among themselves. We want to continue the divide and feel superior about ourselves. It gives us a sense of false freedom .

    We are dis-empowering ourselves. Since we have stopped believing as one united gender, we don’t really matter.And because of that we give everything away to somebody else(men), to something else(rape)

    Powerful piece , Anne. I don’t know if I made much sense, this usually clouds my head and messes with my system. But thank you, in the rush of those comments, many would still be happy because of a man’s acceptance of a girl and this incredible writing brings lays down the bare naked irony of our conditioning.

    Much Love !!

    Like

    1. “What are we expecting from the victim here, should she be thankful that people are willing to marry her inspite of an unwanted tag. Does this mean , that in case of some quarrel , the guy would throw her being rape victim on her face and quote his noble act to establish supremacy. Why are we celebrating this “noble act”? is this also not adding to rape culture.”

      Of course it is. But, this is exactly what it’s all about. A CELEBRATION of a supposed “noble” act on the part of a man. And, I’m not sorry to say this at all, but our culture IS all about just that act. It runs rampant on every damned television and movie screen, it is ever present in literature, and hordes flock and fawn over it, thousands BELIEVE it, want it, demand it. Like a sickness it keeps spreading, but bring out a feminist cause and those same women are quick to title all that as “just entertainment” and insist it’s not how they believe.- Very simply, there is no ownership of this menace outside the ultra conservative circles, and neither is there any ownership of true feminism. That’s the root problem in our society, no one knows what the next person really is… and sadly, most of our women feel trapped between the two choices they see and know are on opposite ends of the spectrum. It scares the shit out of them to pick a side. Can’t say I blame them, but it’s time they did, because the sides cannot and should not be merged.

      Liked by 4 people

      1. “those same women are quick to title all that as “just entertainment” and insist it’s not how they believe” – This reminded me of an argument a very well respected former Bollywood actress gave when she was asked why is that songs which have suggested lyrics or demean women are so well liked and endorsed by her industry. By maintain the holier than thou attitude of ” we don’t think like this” – women just don’t want to acknowledge their contribution in this rape culture. Like here the reporter’s job assignment could have been to record this video and for whatever reasons she couldn’t refuse it, still the onus does likes on us. We would have to make some tough choices and decisions at whatever cost if we want to be true to ourselves. it’s about time we do what we believe in and don’t use excuses or reasons to cover them.

        What is more surprising is that whenever the influence of entertainment sector, literature is thrown around as a contributing factor to rape culture. The most common retaliation is -” but this is not reality, nobody goes on raping or eve-teasing once they see such videos ” . I think people just don’t want to acknowledge the reality of rape culture. They don’t want to know the difference between rape and rape culture. By asking this question in the video we are letting promoting further segregation of rape survivors and making rape sound like some deformity.

        Like

  7. They all say ‘equal to men’ but never ‘equal to men’. Its like women s this lower strata.

    And the girls who are raped, they get more trauma from the media exposure here than the horrific experience. They give news n block letters n front page of newspaper and BOOM… the girls future is a dust.

    Its the outlook of the society that needs to change. Which I don’t think will happen any time soon

    Like

  8. Hi …. Reading into the first few paragraphs i did nt know if one shld feel sad or disgusted with all if ths …. I dont know how many of ur readers r based n india n did thy read todays article n the newspaper wr a photographer has done a photo shoot with the nirbhaya rape case as the bak drop …. Its showing a woman being molested by 3 men n a bus … Mind u its a photo shoot …. Totally disgusting …. Clarification given by the photographr is tht he is trying to show what women n delhi go thru …. Its sooo sad …..
    Comung bak to ur article i totally agree with u on ur point tht we need to be equal amngst us first rather than be equal to men … I think v r way above thm ….
    Wanna write some more abt mind sets which hav such a false prenotion abt pretty n beautiful but tht n the next post ….
    Write now hubby home n its dinner tym
    Late n the night wanna share some views abt who exactly is pretty
    Thr is sooo much goin on in my mind write now … Just hope im able to pen it all down
    Biiii

    Like

  9. Everything u said was true.
    A woman is most of the times another woman’s enemy.
    When fingers are pointed at a girl or woman, majority of them are from women themselves…
    Its women who judge n critisize another woman.
    N right feminism is not just about equal rights bt also equal respect n freedom of choices from the society as a whole.

    N this lady reporter did not do anything great as she thinks she did instead she just scratched the wounds of all the victims ….

    I think this video should be reported n stopped here itself…

    Like

  10. I haven’t seen the video and after reading your article, I really don’t want to see it –
    “Respect for all women” – this is what is being deprived for all women – loved reading ur point of view – I stand by it – thanks for this post

    Like

  11. This is truly a failure. The fact that this video got this airplay in media and circulation and all the people who are sharing and forwarding this en masse in the guise of standing up for rape survivors is completely oblivious of the real problem. What it highlights is not fighting for rape survivors but how warped and fucked up our version of feminism and equal rights is.

    We must first start with changing the women in our society before we do anything else. When will this desperate need for validation from a man end? When will they realize that being equal is not getting’ permission’ from a man to be something?

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Haven’t seen this video but it really sickens me to even think that such a video could have been made and posted on FB … that too by a woman reporter !
    Women are their own worst enemies … feel really sad after hearing about this … just goes to show that our society can never really change till we have women back stabbing and mocking their own gender …

    Thanks Anne …

    Like

  13. A few Indian friends did share that link. I didn’t feel the need to even watch cause the question didn’t make sense. Who the fuck asks that?

    “Did it occur to her that she might have asked one or more rapists that question during her show?”

    Anyone who does watch it, do report the video!
    It is just fucked up!

    Like

  14. I can’t help but think about the psycholof ramifications of such social experiments!

    2014!
    And it’s still like were in the BC (b******d) era.

    I absolutely adore Kalki Koechlin. She’d done a brilliant piece on –

    Saddest part, every moment someone is going through it, another is turning a blind eye to it.
    Silence always was and always will be against the oppressed.

    Like

  15. Sad. I have never been clear on what people mean when they refer to feminism. I usually get tagged as one when I think I am just being rational. Regardless of anything else, refusing to let anyone else do our naming would be a start.

    Like

  16. Does she want to get married? What is marriage for her? A certificate, a validation by the society to her that she has gained her lost respect. But in reality her respect is not dependent upon any illegal act done by a criminal. She was a victim of heinous crime and that society which perpetuates such crimes lost the respect. It was a system failure and that society wanting to cover up its shortcoming comes up with such absurd ideas.

    Like

  17. Disgusting. What genius or bravery do they show by these videos or photo shoots? Height of imbecility. Don’t people think before making a ‘show’ of anything and everything? It needs a radical change in psyche of the whole society, and the chances of it are bleak. Great you shared your thoughts Anne.

    Like

  18. Just coming off a bitch slapping session in Facebook about this video. A school friend of mine posted this on her timeline asking “How many real men are there in my friends list who would dare to answer this question?”

    So I asked her “Hey, what do you label yourself as? Non Raped? Moron? Idiot? Or all three? Just curious.”

    Long story short, she unfriended me. Boohoo. I have no one to bitch slap now. [Dont judge me. I bitch slap morons for recreational purposes. Its my thing. Let it go.]

    Anyways.

    The first thought that crossed my mind was – What about millions of women who are raped by their husbands? Ooh. How are we going to “save” them, oh Mighty Society?

    You know, Anne……I can deal with a man measuring my worth by my vagina. I have dealt with such behaviour in some form or the other in my life. I am trained and better equipped to deal with douche bags and assholes. After years of fighting and shedding tears, sweat and blood, I have pleasantly discovered that a simple “Fuck You. Oh wait, I dont want to” works just fine.

    What I have difficulty in dealing with is, when women themselves take part in this ridiculous judgement. Maybe I am still that naive stupid teenager somewhere at the back of my head. Even though I have been betrayed by female friends, let down by female relatives and disappointed by female politicians, my brain has difficulty processing that most women do not have the ability to stand by each other.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Anne what can I say. I feel disgusted totally. I haven’t seen the video neither did I know abt it before this.I m just speechless. a girl did it its like impossible to imagine. The question should bethis

    WILL YOU MARRY A RAPIST?

    coz this is a real task marrying a monster whose evil deeds might affect ur kids. This will be the most nobel case to marry someone who raped someone else.

    Yes this pathetic rules or requirements r upheld by the women of society. They have a longggg list which have to be in the girl. pathetic.A girl who’s raped n survived is not the one who NEEDS special treatment she deserves everything a normal girl deserves.

    Did the reporter with all her “taking to the streets
    independence” pause long enough to think she could very
    well become a victim of rape herself? No she did not. How
    many young girls are being gang-raped on the streets
    these days? (and not just in India by the way) Did it occur
    to her that she might have asked one or more rapists that
    question during her show?

    She might have n their answer might have been in negative even if they say yes.

    Also, and most importantly, would she even consider
    asking a question like that if she was ever (heaven forbid)
    in the shoes of a rape survivor? I’m guessing no. So, what
    makes her believe she is different and above them? What
    gives her the right to tag yet another label on women and
    expect them to just bear it? How is this progressive, or
    feminist, or right in any damned way?

    Reality is all she must have thought is the trp the show will get n the boast it will result in her bank account thts what they do. they don’t sympathize any victim or sufferer they just sell them n laugh at the money they got. Remember what our news channels do…. they telecast anyone who’s suffering n urges others to help them n then declares theirs was the only channel coz of which it happened or theirs was the quickest reporting as if it matters. I wonder how heartless these reporters r! coming back to this woman I can’t even wish that some day she gets to walk in her shoes only then she’ll know what those girls might have felt.

    She took every woman who has been raped by men, and
    paraded them publicly before men, and asked those same
    men if they would accept these survivors as their wives.

    how true but disgusting this is!

    How much females disgrace other females? Men r dogs agreed but females r no less than bitches. Its always women who judge others.

    The real question should be from that girl whether or not she wants to entrust her soul to another man the race of whom disrespected her body but couldn’t touch her soul. why is she have to shut herself from normal life. why? This was for the adults but what about the babies whom these animals use to satisfy their hunger. I have read/heard many women n men claiming that girls should not go out after 9 pm as if the rape never happened in broad day light anyways n not to forget the DRESS coz it awakes feelings so my question is in which way those baby girls can awake THAT feelings instead of fatherly love. I know I have gone another way but I m fe3ling digusted.

    I wish a day come when women are not treated like this.

    I am not interested in whether men should or should not
    “accept” women who are rape survivors, whether they will
    marry them or not, date them or not, consider them
    “damaged” or not. I do not want to pound on men and say
    “Oh you MUST” or “Wow you’re so NICE to accept her as
    your wife. Kudos.”
    What I am interested in is not seeing yet another fucking
    category for women to be slotted into as if we are pieces of
    meat in a butcher’s shop, and I certainly don’t want to see
    it being done by women.

    Same here n yes educated or not majority of women do this wearing those invisible glasses to do post mortem of girls.

    As a woman, I am
    embarrassed for them.

    me too

    I don’t even want to watch it really hate tht woman

    Like

  20. Anne I don’t know whether its pathetic or not y don’t u guys post real life stories with a lesson to learn like I know an incident where a grp of five frnds raped a girl well four of them n one by one n when the fifth one went inside to do it he found his sister bleeding to death the girl he was eager to rape was his sister(it happened in my city where I was born n brought up) n not just abt rape on anything.

    Like

  21. Just not interested in that video, you have described enough to avoid viewing it. It took me some time to respond to your post regarding such a serious social issue, its so much easier to be frivolous.

    So many points you have raised here…crass wannabe journalism, an acceptance that fielding a woman would somehow exhibit a sympathy angle, one more label to be judged by, the notion that only a man can be part of the solution, lack of respect towards women & gender inequality, the crime itself – what is being done about it?

    I feel like a hypocrite talking about such an issue as I have personally not done anything to address the problem other than expressing my angst against such attitudes & actions of men, women & societies that allow this to happen/sweep it under the carpet/find excuses/provide solutions that knee-jerk. Is it enough? Does it absolve me of my responsibility as another concerned person?

    Like

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