Chani, Pret-a-Blogger

Damn you Anastasia Steele!

Okay the trailer is out and there is nothing anyone can do about it. The world is going nuts and Valentines day 2015 is going to be the year that all the men of this world will finally get their retribution for being made to buy flowers/teddy bears/chocolates etc for centuries. They are finally going to get what the have ever wanted and die is mass orgasmic bliss when their wives girl friends come home after watching the 50 shades of crap.

Although i knew it was going to be disgusting one thing that pissed me the fuck off is the way vapid Ana is styled. I mean she is supposed to be a college student for crissake does she have to look like she borrowed her grandmother’clothes??

She is going to interview this man and THAT is what she wears? Fine i can take the mismatched colours etc but really that and the bangs she fucking cut herself??? which kind of woman does that these days?  As you can see this got me so pissed of i decided to show her.  I have picked some key outfits based on blog’s i have read since i never could get past the first few chapters so forgive me if i made any errors. Oh the blogs by the way were marvelous and fantastically well written unlike the book. So Miss. Ana Steele watch and learn!

1) The Interview ( Ironic i know)

You are going to interview an eligible bachelor not Miss Marple FFS!

Interview outfit

2) Drinks at the Bar

You can wear Jeans. You can wear grey sweaters but there is NO excuse for ignoring proper shoes.  Absolutely None!


Grey Sweater

3) Negotiating the Contract

You are not setting up a cup cakery. You are about to get tied down (literally). Knock his balls off!

Plum Dress


4) The Graduate

No chiffon bullshit. You let the world know you are coming!  ( In case you are worried about the slit, well that’s why they give you a cloak dummy!)


 5) Meet Mrs. Robinson

I mean God is just sweet. Really he is.

Mrs Robinson

Sadly I am not done. Just like the books this is my first installment.

Will be back with more.

Later’s Baby!


15 thoughts on “Damn you Anastasia Steele!”

  1. now I agree totally wid u the dressing is way too awful n to think tht Ana can’t even wear presentable clothes I don’t think I can’t digest tht I simply can’t her hair her everything spells out of date


  2. Before I spew anything else, can i just say I am having Heebie-jeebies, just by reading and drooling all over the stunning fashion lust.

    fack why pay the actors , when you can bring a woman to her knees by showing her “The Shoes” and “The dress”. Hubbhaaaaaaaa that wrap number, slit, white sheath (searching the net for them)).

    ^^ Guess this won’t have make the night for the guys or rather it might , promise it would be way more sexy than any red room fake-outs.

    Oh God , still hyperventilating over the dresses. Chani, I want !!!

    Well, you would know Ana has issues when she dresses like this in books and in movie. You gotta up your fashion game if you want to play with the boytoy.

    What was she smoking, i mean she went all vanilla on shoes and dresses when things were all knotty in the red room. Name me one girl, who would do that, ONE??????????/

    Pictures are sooooooooo distracting. That Jolie one- want !!!

    umm Ridiculous , this post got me all Shades of lust.

    Chaniiiiiiiiiiiiiii, My Fashion Queen – You give me Blake and now this!!! How would I ever live . Is this the secret of Blake acing it up and around. She would have schooled and eaten Grey for breakfast and then chopped his balls to put on the wall for memories.

    I want more , more and pleaseeeeeeee don’t stop!!

    Hugs love and kisses !!

    This would have made Blair Waldorf super proud!!

    P S- And in the end, like they say, Fashion is all about eventually becoming naked, So pay heed to , Ana.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I have not read the book, but did look up the trailer just to find out what riled you & Anne up so much. Ana does look deliberately clumsy & school marmy type, it is so obvious that one would have thought it follows the book line. Obviously not if I read you right Chani.

    By the way the dresses were superb, all of them! The trailer, the initial bits reminded me of your story The Interview, which was open to readers for the initial chapters.


  4. Somebody please tell Joan Rivers to retire. The real Fashion Police is here.

    Oh and Chani…. love you for calling it 50 shades of Crap. My faith in Female kind has been somewhat restored. I was at a party last night where this book was discussed at length by impressionable women that made me feel like an outcast. Yes. Yes. 3 decades of not being part of the herd wasn’t enough.


  5. I’ll take the shoes and bag from the first picture, thanks. Replace the leather pants in the second picture with black denim and that’s pretty much my favourite kind of casual winter wear. Third and fourth is so you, and the fifth reminds me of you know which classy who. Hehheeh

    What a great post! I want more!!!


  6. I was like WHAT THE HELL! when i saw her dressed like that. How can they do this???!!!!A normal woman off the street is far better dressed than that and they seriously think that Mr. Grey was attracted to some one dressed like that?!!! but then , if he was, He needs a brain scan


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