On Angel Wings – Guest Post by Dreamymaya

I met Dreamymaya a couple of years ago when she was an ardent follower of one of my stories. I always found her comments very thoughtful and this led to email exchanges though which I got to know her more. She is a PhD and a researcher by profession but I found that like her name suggests she is just another a dreamer like me.

For those of you who follow this blog, I am sure you have come across her regular comments, and if you have stopped to read them you would find that she is someone who immerses herself in the tale and the characters.  She always gives her perspectives and passionately shares her feelings about everything.

As writers we always treasure the thoughts of our readers and it’s a pleasure for us to engage with them.  She is one of the few readers who is a through and through Regular who has also always encouraged  and supported us, and we value it tremendously.

She loves literature, travel and movies of all kinds. She is also a complete foodie, South Indian being a favourite.

Dreamymaya is also a writer, and this is perhaps one of the other reasons we have connected with her so well. We are extremely happy that she is joining us today not only as a reader but as a contributor.

Please join me in welcoming Dreamymaya on her first official Guest Post on Deranged Writers.

Guest Post by Dreamymaya – On Angel Wings (The Invincible Feeling Called Love)

2013 wasn’t so great for me. Of course, there had been good moments but most of the time; I was fighting depression, hopelessness and many other negative feelings. All because I was let down by best friends, felt betrayed when my trust in people broke and the last nail on the coffin was when my wedding was called off. In short – I hated myself for feeling vulnerable, for allowing myself to be exploited, manipulated and used in the name of love and friendship. I became a temper queen and anyone who dared to say how beautiful love is or spoke about marriage heard an earful from me.

But with her – let’s call her Angel (for she had been my Angel during those days) it was different. Even though I wanted to extinguish the feeling called love from my life and hated love with a vengeance, with her, I advocated in favour of it.

Reason? Love is precious. Even though I didn’t want to believe in it, I couldn’t let go of that magical feeling of love completely. Even when I was betrayed and hurt, I didn’t want my bitterness to affect others.

Angel reminded me so much about my younger self and I didn’t like it one bit. I wanted her to enjoy life, not hold back like I did (because I did regret holding back and being cautious at a later stage in my life). Hence I started lecturing her about love.

One thing which I realized while I was writing this post is that even though I had given up on the emotion called love, whenever she used to talk about him, it made me smile and it filled me with a kind of hope that all is not lost and bad in this world. So I decided to play a fairy in her life and make her realize the possibility of a wonderful love she could experience if she was less stubborn and a bit more relaxed with him.

But I had my work cut out for me since the girl had always been a control freak! An obsessed “CAT” student. One who had so many plans about her career than her life. She is blunt, smart, tough and sharp. She considers life and career as one. It took a hell of a lot of patience to drill something about love and life into this girl’s head.

And what challenged me most was her no-nonsense attitude and that she doesn’t give a crap to the concept called love. With lots of patience and resilience I managed to rub off some of my magic on her, and since then she has been improving. She did strike a friendship with him after all these years of studying together and then realized that she actually liked his company and his talks (Pats myself on the back).

I used to listen to her rambling (lot of excitement and squeals) about the happenings and things they talked about with a smug smile on my face. It was also a time of realization for me too – I can renounce love but I can never stop enjoying the joy the feeling gives.

Angel had described him to me as a pervert in the beginning. That’s what she loved calling him then. But I strongly disagreed. Of course he is a ladies’ man, his charming persona and the ‘bad boy’, ‘heart breaker’ image adds more charm to his persona in my eyes. What to say? I have a thing for bad boys! But as I observed him through her versions, I saw he did have some good qualities, he isn’t totally a pervert. He is different, ambitious like her, but more funny and wittier than her.

He treats her differently, admires and respects her for what she is. Oh forgot to mention – he has killer looks which makes you drool!

 Whatever rumors had been there about him remained rumors to me because whenever he interacted with her, well, I felt him like a perfect gentleman. Once during an exam, she forgot her watch and when the damsel in distress expressed her problem to no one in special, without a thought, our knight in shining armor removed his watch and gave it to her (Which caused her jaw to drop in surprise & poor Mr. Knight disturbed his invigilator throughout the exam to ask for the time).

Another time, when the placement interviews were going on, our Angel had a tough technical round and had no hope of clearing the HR round. While she was sitting dejected, our Prince Positive reassured her with a small squeeze on her wrist that she would do well and ta-da she cleared the round easily with a lot of confidence.

But the best one was when he got selected for  the Air force, he broke the news first to her, by calling her before entering home, while it was drizzling outside. How sweet and romantic!

So far these two are playing this game of sweet gestures. And I am really getting bored. She claims that there is nothing between them but I can’t totally digest it. She always underestimates him. However, I have this gut instinct that there is something special between them. It is during these times, I really wish that I had this fairy magic in me so that I can really make something happen for them. They make an awesome and handsome couple!

Anyways, I hope something will happen soon but with my whole heart I hope that he doesn’t hurt her. If he does, then I will hunt him down and break his bones.

Moral of this post: You can get me out of love but not love out of me. 

About our Guest Poster

Dreamymaya is a 28 year old, single career woman currently working as a post doc researcher in the city of Delhi. She also holds a PhD in cancer nanotechnology. Hailing from Kerala, India, at heart Dreamymaya remains a true South Indian no matter where she goes. With a weakness for Idli vada sambar and other traditional foods, as well as filter coffee, she is a self-proclaimed foodie. – Also an aspiring writer, Dreamymaya has recently taken on the task of revamping a story she began to write in 2012. Strange Love is available now on her blog (http://mayayudeillusions.wordpress.com/) with a fresh perspective, and several meaningful changes.

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29 thoughts on “On Angel Wings – Guest Post by Dreamymaya

  1. These guests are all the names I have been seeing on your stories and reading their detailed comments and wishing I could write as beautifully as they do. I had stumbled upon her blog I had found her blog last year in November and have it bookmarked, I have not started reading the story on it as I saw she had not updated more than once last year,I will now stalk it regularly . Would love to read her work.

    I pray she does not get hurt too. As for you Dreamymaya , no matter what anyone says there is someone out there for you too and Ek na ek din woh zarour milay ga!

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    1. Naushl78! Thank you for those lovely words. Yes, I had been inactive for sometime. But no more!
      “no matter what anyone says there is someone out there for you too and Ek na ek din woh zarour milay ga” – aha! Rightly said! Reminds me of DDLJ sweet Farida Jaleel character!.

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  2. This brought tears to my eyes and heart

    Believe it or not, I owe you one. For the last line and what it motivated me to do a mere secs ago

    Thank you Dreammaya, thank you Chan, thank you DWs!!!!!!!

    Mmmmmmmuah

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  3. Dreammaya, I am quite familiar with your comment at various threads & blogs..Never knew that we both belong to same profession & same subject too. It obvious that our job just suck out every energy except for planning the next experiments.. But you deserve a big applause…Loved your story which u left half way..keep writing … best of luck…
    SIMI

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    1. Oh! That’s great. It’s very nice to meet a person from the same profession….Oh don’t mention about the work life..you will see the effect of work life in SL..Thank you for the wishes! Good luck with your experiments!

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  4. Hey ya Dreammaya!! big big hugssssssssssssss!!

    I noticed a your comment first on Rafa’s post, something special stuck to my heart and there we exchanged a little chat of ours.

    2013 would seem shitty to you now, but , trust a few more years down the line you would appreciate and be thankful to what this year taught you. You biggest win has been in not giving up on this feeling called love.

    I went awwww and ahhhhhh with this story of your Angel’s love. Ah the blushes and the denials. Innocent and pure, I am sure she will blossom to be a fabulous individual in her own right especially when she has you guiding her in the matters of heart. And she is a “CAT” nerd huh, been there , done that!! My little cent to her- enjoy life and the love.

    Wait o What , you are a Dr. Dreammaya, dude those degrees are super sexy, flaunt them like your Gucci’s and Choos’. My bff is also a Phd in your field , you should learn how she uses that “Doctor” tag to pick her dates. Your Man better be worth every freaking second you studied for that degree and more.

    And like I always say, when it gets too suffocating , kick someone around and give a big “eff”” to the world!!

    Love your comments on DW, they make me think !!

    Hugs and love Dreammaya, keep dreaming and keep sizzling!!

    DW- Big big mushy thankyou!!

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    1. My dear Genie -Thanks a lot! You gave me a new perspective for my Dr. tag. I had never thought of equating my degrees to Gucci, Coach or Choos..Now when I do like you mentioned, it looks great and attractive and sexy too..Cool yaar! I loved that! However I prefer not to use that tag to date men..you will know the reason soon in Strange love or I will let you know personally. Btw, loved this line “Your Man better be worth every freaking second you studied for that degree and more”— yea he better be! And you are again right – 2013 taught me so much and it make me strong too. Yes, like you told the biggest win is not giving up on love – I felt it today you know? The old feeling of floating above the ground, smiling at everything, the eyes feeling a coolness and abandon laughter. Yes, the sizzling feel! Oh it was beautiful to be back in love again – this time with myself and to make it complete – Delhi weather had been kind today – full day it was drizzling making the atmosphere more romantic! Oh btw, I loved that note of advice to angel – when I saw that, I immediately texted her to read it. She is digging in some book for the IIM interview..

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  5. Can relate to some of this on a personal level. Very touching, Beautifully written!
    DWs – Thank you for posting this and letting this reach so many of us!

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  6. Aha, DM- have read her comments on a couple of stories that I do follow. Love reading the wonderful and thoughtful comments she writes.

    “You can get me out of love but not love out of me.”
    Here’s hoping love always finds you. 🙂

    And, it doesn’t surprise me to learn that she is a writer herself.

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  7. DM … Maya … if I may call you that 😉
    Great to see a guest post by you …
    “You can get me out of love but not love out of me.”
    that is so true …

    have loved reading your comments on all the stories that
    I have been reading and look forward to reading the story
    on your Blog … hugs and much love …

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  8. Hello DreamyMaya well though we never communicated but I have seen ur comments on DW n IF. First of all thank u for trusting us to share ur personal life n I know u might not need but don’t lose hope n TRUST. I really feel attached to u for betraying frnds as I always m the sufferer of it. Love I haven’t tried n I wish not to do it. loved ur Angel’s story n ur few lines

    I have a thing for
    bad boys!

    me too

    You can get me out
    of love but not love out of me.

    n honestly no one can get love out of a girl. Dreams and love and fairytales r just part of us running in our blood. Really just loved ur Angel’s love story n I would say tht the guy loves her his gestures say so. so I wish them best ofuck n thanx again for sharing it

    To DW this idea whoever among u got it is just awesome n really thank u guys for doing so

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    1. Thank you Farwa for those generous words of love and affection. It’s my pleasure to share my experiences – good or bad. Each has its own lessons to teach and if you could help others with your words or actions, I feel good.
      “And honestly no one can get love out of a girl. Dreams and love and fairytales r just part of us running in our blood” — Loved the way you phrased it! Well said and very true!
      Really just loved ur Angel’s love story n I would say tht the guy loves her his gestures say so — You felt it right? That’s it! I used to tell her this numerous times and she tells me to get out of my fairy world. Aha! Devilish grin- Now I have an ally who thinks similar!

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  9. It’s remarkable how words never let you down. They always let you express yourself, no matter what it is that you choose to say. To be able to open up so completely, I salute you, DM! Thank you for sharing yourself with us, and allowing us to share your life with you.

    I live by the motto

    “Never complain, because there’s always someone out there competing with more than you”.

    Thank you for opening my eyes, and showing me that strength can be found in the most unexpected places. Your friend reminds me a lot of me. Tough, never wanting to need anyone. Needless to say, no one’s making the same attempt with me, but your last line really hit a chord.

    A complete, movie synchronized “awwww” at the culmination of that adorable story.

    Madame, never doubt yourself, and never give up, no matter how dark it seems, because as bad as things seem, you guys touch hearts, and make so many lives better by just placing your hands on a keyboard. Thank you. All of you. For everything. Somewhere, everyday, you give someone a reason to keep fighting. Today, I think it was me. Thank you.

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    1. Dear Soho19, Thank you for your generous words. I was touched by your words “make so many lives better by just placing your hands on a keyboard”. Yes, it’s true, reminded me of many people who helped me during those dark days of depression. Even now when a small enquiry “hope all is well with you”, “All good?”, Angel’s classic “I need to check on you every 5 hours – what you doing now?”— all these simply makes you feel cherished and feel the love.

      It’s not that we are capable of doing things but these gestures of love and affections makes us feel special. It helps to overcome our vulnerabilities, insecurities and the feeling that we aren’t alone. We can love ourselves better than anyone. But when we are remembered and asked after our well being, it always leaves us in better spirits.People are greedy for money and love. It’s a kind of greediness which will never dimish.

      For some, it’s difficult to open up, they feel it as a sign of weakness or putting them out in the open-naked and vulnerable. I dunno, for me it was always easy to speak about myself than about others, It’s my plus as well as a risk which I take. My aim while sharing about myself is to impart my strength to others so that they can imbibe some energy from it and make themselves feel better. I am glad that you found that strength and that fulfills me.

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  10. DreamyMaya…I’ve always liked your user name and pictured you as a young woman with dreams in her eyes and a soft smile on her face…:)

    I’m sorry you had such a bad 2013, but I wish that 2014 brings you the happiness and peace you deserve. I know it sounds cliched, but maybe what happened was for the best…

    “You can get me out of love but not love out of me.”
    That tells me that there is still hope for you, girl!! Keep smiling. 🙂

    I loved your Angel story and I hope the two of them find their happiness some day.

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    1. Thank you amv63! Yes I also a firm believer of “whatever happens, happens for a reason! Oh! I loved that picturization! Well, I am not that girly type in looks with dreamy eyes and soft smile. Instead to the world I have that undercover agent look (with a highly sensitive antenna for picking on love signals) But once you get to know me, there would always be a smile specially for you!

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  11. DM, I think I read this around 5-6 times and my thoughts are still in a jumble..I don’t think I still have it together…I’m so sorry you had to go through all that in 2013 and so glad that you had your sister and a lot of friends to support you.. I know our friendship is pretty new, but when you are tired doing your work all night or want to rant about something or even talk about mammukka and his awesome son and nobody who cares about you is around at the time, remember I’m awake at the other end of the world.. :D..You know where to find me..

    You are one optimistic trooper and I loved, loved your last line..

    Like

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